this moment was that and will be...

Since the return of my trip, I have found it so hard to be in this moment. It feels more like those moments I remember and the ones that will become. I have not been able to focus at work for many reasons but a huge one being the Peace Corps. I can't wait to quit my job. I will be happy to leave it. I have been feeling uneasy more than anything because having the spirit of a dreamer; I have been particularly jaded with the constant routine of it all. Now, I eat, sleep and breathe PC related talk, thoughts, plans and dreams. I was extremely grateful to have received my invitation before my trip but it also became an overwhelming few weeks of excitement. As soon as I was on that plane leaving NYC, it was hard to think of PC related things when my excitement also focused on my trip. I made sure to deliver everything by its deadline. However, it was tough to concentrate on that aspiration statement, when you're hyped up on caffeine, beer and lack of food intake. Nonetheless, all was complete and to my best ability for that moment. This moment all I can think about is what will be.
I am extremely happy that I was able to have that opportunity to go back to Wisconsin prior to departing for Ecuador. I had an amazing time filled with memories that will last a lifetime. When I arrived in Milwaukee, I was greeted by the first friend I made in Wisconsin, my old roommate, my best friend, now more like my family, Crystal. I was able to spend five wonderful days with her, catching up and enjoying the moments. During our time together, I met her new boyfriend, who was a sweetheart and some of his friends. We spent time with her sister Mandi, who I love, at an Admiral's game. We got to see some of the amazing Drop Kick Murphy’s and go to some old bars I use to spend time at. On Sunday, I was able to have dinner with Melany and her soon to be husband Will. I was so happy to have gotten to spend time with them both, it's been too long. It was sad to leave Crystal but also exciting that I was not yet finished with my time away.
Monday night I was dropped off at Daniele's house, my best friend, other half, on the other side of Wisconsin. On Tuesday, I attempted to rest and complete PC related work but unfortunately was consistently annoyed by Daniele's cute dog. On Tuesday night, we arrived at the car rental completely psyched for the known and unknown parts of our road trip. I hopped in the driver seat first because Daniele had been working all day. We didn't wind up leaving Milwaukee until about 6pm. It's been awhile since I drove on the open road and boy did it feel good. There is nothing like just taking control of that wheel, riding through the night with an open sky, a whole world of opportunity lays ahead of you....mine lead to an immediate speeding ticket. Maybe I was enjoying the open road a little too much? But hey, the adventure doesn't truly begin until things go wrong! The best part of the road trip was my companion, who couldn't be more of a perfect match for me. We complement each other so well and in the end, that is what made the trip worthwhile. There is really no one else I could see myself doing this with and was so happy to have had the opportunity to see the country before I leave it with such an amazing person like Daniele. We arrived in Omaha, Nebraska around 2am on a Tuesday night. I had previously researched a historic bed and breakfast for us to spend the night at. Daniele saw a few pictures online and thought the place to be creepy. When we arrived, we were greeted with warm and friendly middle of the night hospitality. I had got us a deal at the cheapest price for the suite. It was a beautiful home with wonderful history, next door to also the only castle in Nebraska, coming in at 35,000 sq ft. I would say I got my fill of Nebraska.
From here Daniele drove through the wide open, flat, gray plains of Nebraska. Our host had informed us of the 7:1 ratio of cows to people, it was no lie. There was not even a place to stop for gas. As we reached the Colorado boarder we realized that the tank was empty. Daniele pulled off an exit to what seemed like a ghost town from a horror movie. It was a deserted gas station, broken down and ancient. We could not have laughed harder at the sight. We arrived in Denver around dinner time. I had found a cool brewery downtown and it had delicious food and beer. We didn't get to spend enough time in Denver. I would like to go back one day. I got a feeling of comfort there.
I decided to drive the remainder to Crested Butte, CO where we were going to spend a couple days with my lovely friend Jeselle. There were no major roads leading to this valley, so back roads, through the Rocky Mountains it is. As we began to exit the city, a plethora of Jesus paraphernalia popped up, that began the whole adventure of Jesus throughout the trip. HE was everywhere we drove. As my mom would say, watching over me. Hey maybe someone was because I always got the shit end of the rides but trekked it through with memories and laughs! We began seeing signs-Watch out for Wildlife. Watch out for Elk. Watch out for Deer. Watch out for falling rocks. Avalanche Area. Curvy Road Ahead.13,500 elevation. As we drove up, the snow began to fall thicker. A thick ice cover the part of the bend and-boom: right into the snow bank! It was better than going left, down the mountain! Let me add, we are in a Chevy Cobalt, no cell service and not a car in sight for miles. But wait, Jesus was watching over us, did you forget? A man in a pickup truck, who we thought we lost miles back, miraculously showed up and helped us out. From then on I drove slow, very slow. We wound up having to do about 20 mph the whole way until we were off the mountain. Before we hit the town, hundreds of deer felt like chilling on the side of the road almost making Daniele piss herself, which is always a good time. Arriving in Crested Butte was like a dream, it looked just like it was out of a movie. An immediate drink was in order. The rest of our time in this magical town was amazing with more than a few crazy moments thrown into it. Jeselle couldn't of shown more friendly hospitality and because of her we were able to have a great experience in CO. We were both glad that we were able to make that a stop on our agenda.
For some reason I agreed to drive the rest of Colorado. I seemed to always get stuck driving the most dangerous route with the most beautiful scenic view, which Daniele could never seize to capture. Colorado's mountains stole a piece of my heart. I truly fell in love with the beauty of all that was Colorado and I can't wait to go back there someday. I cannot say that I can see myself living many places at this point in my life but CO is now on my list. We ran into some trouble driving those mountains again but with my excellent driving abilities, I saved us from near death more than once. We stopped at a beautiful trading post on our way to Arizona. Every person we encountered on this trip showed us more than necessary hospitality and friendliness, it felt nice. We stopped at Four Corners Monument which was cool because I am not sure there are many times in someone's life they will be able to be in four places at once...check.
From there she took over the controls, accelerating to make up for precious lost time due to my more than careful mountain driving experience and fear of another ticket. We finally reached our destination of Gilbert, AZ. This was how the whole road trip idea was born. We thought it would be wonderful to see her best friend Nicole, whom I shared memories with. The trip to Nicole was the longest and the lack of food was hitting us. We were greeted with smiles, food and margaritas-can't get better than that. When we woke we went to a fabulous breakfast joint, a brewer’s spring training game, Mexican dinner with some more margaritas, this time prickly pear and then on a light rail pub crawl. We wound up at interesting bars and ended the night with a touch of drama. We woke up early the next day and spent the day in Sedona to get a real feel of the desert. The desert is beautiful but I just did not fall in love as I did with Colorado.
Leaving Arizona, we ditched all plans ahead to visit another friend in the effort to save time and money. This left us feeling a little more alone but a good deal more free. We felt that the real road trip began since we truly had no plans ahead of us. From Arizona through New Mexico, we stopped at many trading posts in search for some prickly pear tea, that we were determined to get. We got to see the continental divide, which was more touristy than anything. We arrived in Albuquerque, NM and I had previously written down a dive located there. Apparently, Albuquerque is not a hot spot but more like the Mexican ghetto with a little sketchiness involved, well the parts we experienced anyway. We arrived at the dive and boy, was it a dive. The “steakhouse” was a cemented building with no windows, connected to a liquor store. We actually hesitated to go inside but stirred up the courage or maybe just the hunger, to go inside. It was a grease pit but satisfied us, definitely not television worthy though. While we were eating, I googled prickly pear tea in the area and a company came up in the search. We decided to head over there. The gps went a little nuts and we wound up in an industrial neighborhood. It turns out this was the location of the warehouse, not a store. We decided to still go check it out. When we arrived, we were greeting with enthusiasm and friendliness. Not only did they agree to sell us products but we also received a tour of the warehouse, how to make and package the coffee, as well as meet the owner himself. It was quite an experience and we were more than glad we decided to go inside. However, after all that effort to obtain the tea, I found out that I could have just gone to my local Trader Joe’s!
We made our way to Amarillo, TX which happened to be the only major town on the way. Daniele was determined to meet a cowboy that night, since we were in Texas of course! However, my passion for bed and breakfasts led us to having a different type of night, than Daniele had imagined! As we arrived to our bed and breakfast, Daniele knew instantly that she had been officially cowboy cockblocked!!
When we woke the next day we drove to Oklahoma City and stopped for some delicious bbq. We drove through Kansas, where this time Daniele was stopped for speeding. Although, this time around when the cop was asking questions and I saw her getting anxious, I nudged her to shut up and tried to flirt my way out of it. As the cop approached the car again he handed her a warning, stating it was because he liked the passenger, score! That night we wound up in Kansas City, MO, where Daniele refused to have us stay in a bed and breakfast, due to the last experience. All I can say is she made up for lost time partying, Happy Fat Tuesday. A good end to our trip to have the craziest memories end it off.
All in all, the road trip was more than amazing, filled with memories that will last a lifetime. I may have omitted some of the embarrassing or inappropriate stories!
I already know my destiny is to travel. Perhaps one day, tired of circling the world, I'll return to one of my destinations and call it home, if not indefinitely then at least for another pause while I shift from one understanding of the world to another. Next stop..Ecuador.

You are invited to.......

I have been too filled with excitement, to have posted anything in the past day. On Friday, February 18, 2011, I received the second phone call from my PO, whose name I now know, Brian. This conversation went very smoothly. He told me that he had chosen a program, which he feels best fits my skills. He asked me a few more questions, such as if I was happy with Central/South America departing in June, which I am of course. He also asked if anything has changed legally or medically. He then told me that he was sending my invitation that morning via air mail. I was so excited because it would reach me just in time, before I leave on my trip to Wisconsin/ road trip from the Midwest to the Southwest. On Tuesday, I was texting my mother all day asking if the mail had arrived and she finally told me around 3pm. She did not want to tell me that it came because she knew that I would leave work to come home and open it. It was best she waited because I took off of work the rest of the week anyway and yes, I would have not been able to work for the remainder of the day. The trip home was hard, I was so anxious, my heart was pounding. This is the biggest moment of my life, this determines where I will be spending 27 months, maybe more, of my life. I ripped the envelope open as fast as I could and couldn't even think straight when I read my assignment. I am invited to Ecuador as a HIV/AIDS Prevention Education Volunteer, under the Community Health Program. I had predicted it was going to be either Peru or Ecuador, and could not be any happier with my invitation. Ecuador is such a diverse, beautiful country and I can not wait to experience it. I am currently reading the plethora of information provided to me and trying to calm myself down and take it all in. I sent my acceptance email : I , Marissa Fontanez, am accepting my invitation to serve as a HIV/AIDS Prevention Education Peace Corps Volunteer, in Ecuador departing June 1, 2011. I hereby certify that I have read the Volunteer Assignment Description, Online Welcome Book, and Core Expectations and agree to abide by the policies therein. I did not have to even read any of that to have made my decision, my decision was made a year ago, each day growing more motivated and determined to serve. This week could not make me any happier, officially being invited to serve as a PCV, receiving my small but helpful tax return, going to see my best friends who I consider family and my home, going on a road trip, and paying off my credit card debt in full!! I have a lot of reading to do and can not wait to learn more about where I will spending 27 months, maybe more, of my life.

The long awaited 202 area code...

I have been patiently waiting, with spurts of anxious moments,  for the famous 202 area code phone call. When I was medically cleared the end of December, I received a phone call from placement asking for an updated resume. After I sent my resume, they replied that I should hear from someone within the next month. It has now been two months and that call finally arrived! After a long day of waiting around St. Luke's to admit my client into rehab, I was ready to go home. I got back to the office finished up some paperwork and started to check out my usual list of blogs, starting with PCJ! How perfect that as I am reading PC blogs, dying for the phone call it comes! I acted like a maniac and ran outside to gain service. I was out of breathe and extremely nervous from excitement. I honestly did not even catch the man's name I was too excited to think. I sat myself down in the most isolated spot I could find, in the corner of an alley way across from a homeless man enjoying his day's meal. I apologized to the PO for my nervousness and excitement. He then began the second interview, which lasted exactly 22 minutes and 29 seconds. The shortest amount of time to decide my entire future. The interview went well, even though I feel I babbled on for some of my answers. Some questions he asked were : Has your motivation to join the PC changed in any way?, How have you prepared for PC during your application process?, How do you feel about being isolated?, What is going to be the biggest challenge you believe you will face and how will you overcome it?, Are you willing to take out all visible piercings and cover any visible tattoos?, How do you feel if you won't be able to communicate via phone or Internet?, Are your family and friends supportive of your decision to leave?, As a woman, you may be discriminated against and disrespected in some cultures. How do you feel about that and how will you handle it?, He also spoke of my language skills, family background being Puerto Rican and how I would feel if I saw no change or process in my projects or community. I may have forgotten a few other questions but that was about it. He then asked if I have any questions, which I didn't at the moment. He then told me that I was qualified for placement! He stated that he has a few programs in mind and that he will need to look into them further to make a decision. He said he would call me back tomorrow or the beginning of next week! I will be anxiously waiting until then. I think due to the timing, that my invitation will be coming in the mail while I am away on my road trip. However, I told my mother that she is NOT allowed to open it but instead must overnight it to wherever I will be at the moment. Now back to the waiting game but at least I am fully qualified for service!

Peace Corps Rersponse to the 20/20 special

All the information in this post has been taken from the Peace Corps direct website. I wanted everyone to hear their statment prior to the special and their response after as well. I have only heard the best regarding the safety regulations the Peace Corps holds and am extremely priviliged to be an applicant and potential volunteer.

"Peace Corps Statement Issued to ABC News’ 20/20 before the program aired:

January 11, 2011

During the production of your story and the interview with Deputy Director Carrie Hessler-Radelet, thePeace Corps has made it clear that, in the interest of justice for Kate Puzey and her family, we will not comment on the ongoing investigation into the murder of Kate Puzey or do anything else that could risk compromising that investigation or any prosecution of the case.It is understandable that the Puzey family wants more information about what happened to their daughter.Kate’s family has our deepest sympathies for their tragic loss, and the Peace Corps is united with the Puzey family in the pursuit of justice for Kate. We have also put into place new protocols that respond to the concerns expressed by the Puzeys on how the agency supports the families of fallen volunteers. Peace Corps does not have a role in the ongoing investigation, but we have been assured that the Benin government is supporting the legal process necessary to conclude the investigation and begin a trial. The Department of State and the FBI have been working with the Benin authorities. Peace Corps manages a comprehensive approach to volunteer safety and security. We always are working to improve and strengthen our training and operations for our staff and volunteers abroad. We will never be able to entirely eliminate volunteers’ exposure to crimes overseas, but we will continue to do our best to make Peace Corps a safe and productive experience for the Americans serving as volunteers today and in the future. A second component to your story covers the concerns of Peace Corps volunteers who have been raped or sexually assaulted while serving abroad. When anything happens to one of our volunteers, we do our best to offer comprehensive support through medical, counseling, and legal services. We are unwavering in our efforts to strengthen our approach to volunteer safety and security.

Since August 2009, when Aaron Williams became Director of the Peace Corps, the agency has put into place measures to improve our security and support operations. The Peace Corps has developed an enhanced agencywide sexual assault prevention and response strategy. This plan is designed to expand the depth and breadth of the agency’s ability and commitment to prevent and respond to sexual assaults. Accordingly, we have undertaken a comprehensive study of best practices in the field of sexual assault prevention, met with leaders in the field of rape prevention and response, written new guidelines for responding to rapes and major sexual assaults for use by overseas staff, developed a statement of Peace Corps’ commitment to victims of sexual assault, and updated the agency’s incident reporting system. Although we have made significant progress in strengthening our security and support operations, we know that more needs to be done. We are committed to implementing additional reforms this year and in the future to improve all aspects of volunteer service. As we proceed, we will keep listening to our volunteers and returned volunteers. In addition, we will continue to seek advice and counsel from outside experts and other government agencies on how to improve our security and support systems. Peace Corps is proud that the vast majority of volunteers feel safe in the areas where they live and work. According to the 2010 Annual Volunteer Survey, 87 percent of our volunteers reported that they were usually safe or very safe where they live and 91 percent reported the same where they work. Peace Corps remains firmly committed to the safety and security of our volunteers. It is our top priority. If ABC News’ 20/20 needs more information on our global operations as you edit your piece, we are available to provide additional data and information to ensure that your program is fair and accurate."

"Peace Corps Director Aaron S. Williams’ Response to ABC News’ 20/20

"ABC's program is deeply troubling and does not accurately reflect Peace Corps' unwavering commitment to our volunteers. The health and safety of our volunteers is the single most important priority for our agency. We are consistently reviewing and improving our global operations to ensure that we are doing our best to keep our volunteers healthy, safe and productive.

"We cannot comment on the ongoing investigation into the 2009 murder of volunteer Kate Puzey in Benin or do anything else that could risk compromising that investigation or the possibility of a successful prosecution. Peace Corps does not have a role in the ongoing investigation, but we have been assured that the Benin government is supporting the legal process necessary to conclude the investigation and begin a trial. The Department of State and the FBI have been working with the Benin authorities.

"Kate represented the best America has to offer the world with her dedication to her community and commitment to public service. Kate's death was a tragic loss for the Peace Corps. We continue to grieve with the Puzey family and Kate's friends. It is my sincere hope that justice is served both for Kate and her family. I would like to offer my apologies to the Puzey family if either the former leadership or the agency under my direction could have been more compassionate. Personally, it is heartbreaking to learn that they ever felt abandoned by the Peace Corps. This has never been our intent.

"Under my leadership, the Peace Corps has been implementing reforms to enhance the quality of Peace Corps service. These reforms include strengthening all health and safety measures. We do everything we can to keep our volunteers safe, and for those who sadly fall victim to crime, we do everything we can to support them in their recovery. The women interviewed by 20/20 are courageous and strong. Their stories are heartbreaking. Since their service, Peace Corps has improved sexual assault prevention procedures and practices, and we will continue to be responsive to the victims of assault and provide comprehensive care.

"We will never be able to eliminate volunteers' exposure to crimes overseas, but we will work continuously to maximize the safety and health systems supporting our volunteers. This is my pledge to Americans serving today and to the volunteers of tomorrow."

• For more information about our commitment to providing a safe and secure environment for our volunteers, please visit the Safety Section on our website.

About the Peace Corps: President John F. Kennedy established the Peace Corps on March 1, 1961, by executive order. Throughout 2011, Peace Corps is commemorating 50 years of promoting peace and friendship around the world. Historically, more than 200,000 Americans have served with the Peace Corps to promote a better understanding between Americans and the people of 139 host countries. Today, 8,655 volunteers are working with local communities in 77 host countries. Peace Corps volunteers must be U.S. citizens and at least 18 years of age. Peace Corps service is a 27-month commitment. "


Also I would like to point out some further informaiton I came across through PCJ. 20/20 presented the fact that over the past decade over 1,000 women have been subject to sexual assault or rape.  Looking at the large statistical figures, these numbers account for about .05 percent of the 200,000+ PC volunteers who have served or are currently serving.  In addition, there have been a total of 279 volunteers who have died during service overseas (From The Fallen Peace Corps Memorial Project).  Of those 279 volunteers who have died, 23 of them were murdered.  The PC publishes a report on safety statistics every few years and you can find much of the information in the most recent of these reports at Peace Corps Wiki’s Safety of the Volunteer Page, which also includes a breakdown of safety statistics by country. (A direct link to the report can be found here).

20/20 you need to check your vision..

As most of you may already be aware, 20/20 had shown a special last night regarding violence in the Peace Corps. I was deeply disturbed by this special but not in the way you might believe. As a current Peace Corps applicant, I have already thought of the dangers as well as the rewards this position could bring. I have prepared myself by speaking to previously volunteers and doing much research. I have heard that at times you may feel isolated and a sense of loss of connection to the agency. I also understand many individuals may apply believing that going to a third world country, through such a large organization, you won't be alone and that the guidance and assistance will help you along the way. If you really want to make a difference, it will only be greater with your vision alone. We are the ones placed in that village, we see what is needed, it is our vision, our work that changes those around us. I am prepared to accept the assistance given to me by the PC but at the same time ready to independently assist my new community with its most vital needs.  In the end, this is our decision to leave, our decision to stay and our decision to take it will all the risks involved. PC does not force us to reside in a community with dangers. If I feel at danger at all during my service, I will leave, with or without the assistance of the PC.  No matter where I decide to go on my journey in life, there will always be risks involved and I need to take that into account.  In the 20/20 special they focused on the violence women have encountered during their time serving in the Peace Corps. They spoke about how the Peace Corps did not take further action in assisting with these women's needs and tried to cover up the assaults which took place. The major problem I had with 20/20 was that they just attacked the Peace Corps and did not discuss the main issue at hand, being the violence and oppression that women encounter in this world. I understand that it may be wrong for the PC to cover up these incidents but it is the federal government we are talking about here, of course they need to contain the image they hold. 20/20 should of spoke about the epidemic of women not only in our country but around the world who are subjected to rape or assault with no where to go after for help. They should of discussed how this happens on every college campus and how most women have nowhere to turn then. They should of discussed all of the jocks who have assaulted women and it being covered up to protect their image. They stated the statistic that 1000 women in the past 50 years have encountered some type of assault while in service. I am sure you can take that number and say it multiplied is how many women are assaulted on a college campus a year. 20/20 should of focused on the issue at hand and discussed ways that organizations such as the PC can take further action to not prevent this, because well unfortunately it can't be prevented, but ways to help cope with what has happened and the actions that can be taken against the perpetrators.  PC just needs to develop a plan for counseling these women and lending support after their tragedies. The whole world does not need to know what happened but these women do need support from those they depended on. I applaud the courage of the women who spoke out about what had happened and understand their anger. However, they should of not only attacked the PC but spoke about the wonderful things that it has done for the majority of its volunteers. Also, what a coincidence that this needs to be spoken of on the anniversary of its 50th. I am not saying PC is perfect but they need to take in account that this is a worldwide issue. As far as we have come as women, there is so much more for us to do to stop the oppression worldwide. 20/20 next time why don't you help make a difference rather than just attacking a national organization. All this special did was give ignorant people a chance to complain further about our government rather than actually make an effort for change. But as Ghandi said, you must be the change you wish to see in this world and that's exactly what Iam going to do. This special did not change my view or decision to further pursue the PC but only made me want to take further steps in attempting to end the oppression of women worldwide.

Reduction of RAS..

I can finally say that my RAS has subsided because I now have something amazing to look forward to, other than leaving for PC. I just booked a flight to Wisconsin. I will be leaving February 24 and spending five full days with the best roommate I ever had/best friend Crystal. I hope while with her I can see some other Madison faves as well. I will then be meeting up with my other best friend Daniele on Tuesday March 1 and the next day we will be heading out on a road trip, our adventure from the Midwest to Southwest. We will be going through Wisconsin-Iowa-Nebraska, possibly stopping at her old co workers place for some rest and then heading out the next day to Colorado. We will be stopping in Crested Brutte to see one of my favorites Jeselle and hopefully spend a full day with her. Then we will be heading to our top destination Gilbert, AZ to see Nicole! We will spend three days there and then go on our way through New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, Missouri, Illinois and back to Wisconsin. We will be stopping, destination unknown, somewhere for a day or so. Our goal is to stop in some way in every state we pass through. I have a goal that I want to have visited 25 states before the age of 25 and it will be accomplished due to this trip! After the trip we will head back to her place where I will spend the remaining weekend in Milwaukee and then head back home to continue suffering from RAS (or hopefully not?). I haven't been back to Wisconsin in over a year and I truly miss the state and most of all my best friends who I am going to cry my eyes out to be leaving again! However, no matter where I am in this world I know these girls will be there for me if I need them and come see me, as long as they have the funds to do so. What is even better, is how I have already started using my PC mentality. I received a cheap flight and won't be spending much due to spending all of the time at others homes. What is better than spending close quality time with my best anyway. I am so happy that things have worked out financially and seem to being going very well. I plan to pay off all my credit card debt by February and then focus on paying off one loan, while buying things I need along the way. Until next time..

While I wait..

I have been counting down the days until the end of this month, just to possibly hear from the PO. I go onto PC journals daily and read all the blog updates, which just make me more anxious. Everyone's story is so different, that it is hard to tell how yours will go. It is hard to describe the feeling I have but it's like hearing about a book you are dying to read but it hasn't come out yet so you are unable to start the story. I can't wait for my story to begin but until then I have to continue to occupy my time and reduce the obsession over my possible future. I decided to slowly begin buying things that I would pack but also could use no matter what, in case by some crazy chance this falls through (I desperately hope not!). I finally bought the DSLR camera I was dying for, my first one, Nikon D3100. Due to my busy schedule I was unable to even check it out until last night. I am having a lot of fun learning about my new camera and can't wait to start taking a bunch of cool pictures. I have been hearing about the 365Project and am very interested in doing it, even though I already missed a week. It might be hard for me to continuously upload my pics but I may just give it a try. The 365Project is just taking a picture a day. It is something that would be easy for me while in the PC and a pretty amazing way to show others my life overseas. However, when I think of doing it now, my life might just not be that interesting for it, but who knows! I also went to the bookstore the other day to pick out a decently priced book/cd combo to help freshen up my Spanish as much as possible until June. I wound up buying the Spanish book for Dummies. I know it sounds silly but it seemed like the most entertaining and informative book at such a decent price. I bought the one with all four books in one, plus a CD. It caught my eye mainly due to the health worker section, since I would need to know those terms if placed in CSA. I also told all my fellow spanish speaking collegues to only speak to me in spanish, but this seems like a hard task because none of them have nor want the ability to teach me Spanish. I hope to at least be more than confident in my basics by June, no matter what happens. Other things to occupy my time; obsessing over paying off my bills, volunteering, working two jobs, and obsessing over PC..oh wait I was suppose to occupy my time with other things wasn't I. I went on PCVJ today and discovered many people who are leaving in June, that recieved their PO interview. This made me slightly nervous but at the same time I have to keep in mind that it is different for everyone, for many reasons. I also started researching which bags I would want to take with me. I went on PCwiki and started by searching all the volunteer discount websites. I checked out all of them and I found this backpack by mountain hardwear koa 55, which I liked because it has the sleeping bag zipper on the bottom but I am thrown off by the color because it seems too military. This is only my first online search, I would also want to look at Dick's and other such stores. Here is a list of other things that interested me after searching all the available discounts: mountain hardwear -sleeping bag,timbuk2 messenger bag  , and some shoes that seemed appropriate : flip flops , another pair of my favorite flats , then I haven't choosen which yet but also a moccasin, boot and sneaker. RAS-Please go away, soon =) Until then, more searching, researching and waiting.